Oh the Holidays

I love the holidays and this time of year.  Let me start with that, because I may sound like a big complainer after this post.  I wanted to write this several days ago, when it was fresh, but time and the motivation just slipped away. 

This year we had our Thanksgiving dinner on Wednesday.  My mom is a nurse and it was her year to work Thanksgiving day and she somewhat volunteered for it so she would have Christmas off.  We thought my brother and his family were going to be here for Christmas, but that has since changed. 

Anyways, so our dinner was on Wednesday, not Thursday.  That was perfectly fine with me.  I know it's not about what day you celebrate, but that you do it with friends and family.  We had discussed beforehand, which day we wanted to do dinner, whether it be Wednesday or Friday.  At my job, like in many others, Friday is typically the busiest day and we were definitely open for business.  So I knew I would have to work that day, in fact I worked 7:45-6:30.  Clearly, my choice for Thanksgiving dinner was Wednesday when I could have the day off. 

As I've mentioned before, I still live at home with my parents.  And unfortunately our Thanksgiving tradition often involves bickering and complaints that the house wasn't clean enough.  It always bothers me that the holidays have to be that way around our house.  This year it really rubbed me the wrong way.  Who spends all day bickering and cleaning or being upset because the house wasn't cleaned to a certain person's standards and then expect dinner to be a cheerful affair?  Take it from me, it's not very enjoyable.

The day ended up with a very large blow out between me and my mom, which naturally puts a little damper on things.  She apparently never wanted to cook Thanksgiving dinner this year in the first place, let alone do it on Wednesday.  I just get so frustrated because how was I to know that?  She never said a word, but on the day of she sets out to put everyone else in a bad mood because she said she never gets what she wants and that we don't ever listen to her.  I feel like I'm all ears, she just never puts her feelings out there until it's too late. 

I think part of why I always get upset around the holidays is because of expectations.  I really don't think my expectations are too high though, at least they shouldn't be.  I don't care what day we celebrate.  I don't care if the food is terrible.  I would just like good company to be with.  I want to be with family, friends, and strangers alike.  I want that festive atmosphere.  Instead what we get are people that either don't show up at all or don't show up at the time they're told we'll be eating.

I know that part of the issue is just me.  Now that I'm older, I'd like to be able to do things my way.  My mom wanted our Thanksgiving "dinner" at noon this year because she had to work the next day.  In years past we had dinner around 2 or 3 in the afternoon.  I think I would like to have an actual Thanksgiving dinner.  I want to eat at like 5 or 6 in the evening.  I'm not really a morning person, so I don't want to be up at 7 to put the turkey in the oven.  Why not put it in around 10 in the morning and have a dinner with it? 

It's sad because the holidays are supposed to be about spending time with family and cherishing each other, but all I was thinking was next year I'll have my own place.  So that's my goal for 2012, get my own place and maybe I'll host the holiday meal.

I wish the holidays brought out only the best in people, instead of the best and worst.  How do you get through the bad times?  When the fights and stress of it all gets you down?  I often feel I would be happier and enjoy the holiday more if I was on my own.  It's the negative attitude and unfestiveness of others that brings me down. 

Please please tell me I'm not the only one that has these issues!  I truly hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and a safe weekend!  May your holiday season be merry and bright!